Steve Correa and Ronald D’Souza
“Trust me; I know what I’m doing.” How many times have you heard these words? Leaders from all walks of life — CEOs, managers, political figures, and even spiritual guides — share this unspoken mantra: trust in me, follow my path, and success will follow. But the real question is: does this really work for everyone?
In the early stages of our careers, many of us look for role models to emulate. We believe that if we mimic their behaviour, we’ll replicate their success. But soon enough, reality begins to unfold a deeper truth: what worked for them might not necessarily work for us. We start to see the gap between their journey and ours. That realisation brings us to a critical turning point in leadership — understanding that leadership is not about fitting into someone else’s mould but finding and embracing our unique selves.
Our character, shaped by our upbringing, society, and personal experiences, often leads us to an internal conflict. We admire and aspire to be like leaders, but something doesn’t feel quite right when we try to follow in their footsteps. As Parker Palmer writes, “Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it, I must listen to my life telling me who I am.” The journey to authentic leadership requires us to confront this tension between following others and carving out our own path.
This is where many leaders falter. They become stuck in the shadow of someone else’s success, losing sight of the uniqueness they bring to the table. Leadership is not about imitating greatness but cultivating self-awareness and courage to lead from your own truth.
Leaders who don’t grow beyond their initial success often stagnate, affecting them and the entire ecosystem they lead. People become cynical about leadership when they feel it lacks authenticity or inspiration. This can happen in organizations where leaders stay in positions of power for years, not because they’re driving progress but because they’ve become comfortable or feel trapped.
In his book Good to Great, Jim Collins emphasises that “good is the enemy of great.” Leaders who cling to outdated strategies or leadership styles may have been effective once, but refusing to adapt and evolve can prevent the organisation from reaching its full potential. Such leaders end up stifling innovation and growth. In this sense, leadership can become an anchor, pulling down the individual and the entire collective they lead.
In ancient Indian philosophy, the concept of the Vanaprastha ashram offers a powerful metaphor for leadership. Traditionally, this phase of life involved a gradual withdrawal from worldly responsibilities, a retreat to focus on spiritual development, and a leadership handover to the next generation. It wasn’t about giving up but moving forward in a new, meaningful way.
This concept resonates deeply with leaders today. Transitioning to a new phase of leadership — whether that means stepping aside, mentoring, or taking on different roles — requires humility and self-awareness. Leadership is not a static role but an evolving journey. Moving forward isn’t about external achievements like wealth or power; it’s about inner growth and discovering who we are at every stage of life.
Leadership isn’t just about leading others — it’s about leading yourself. One of the biggest challenges for leaders is overcoming what can be termed sullen docility. This is the kind of passive, resistant behaviour we often see in those who feel stuck in their leadership roles, unable or unwilling to grow. Their leadership becomes a burden rather than a force for positive change.
On the other hand, sāttvic assertion — a concept rooted in Indian philosophy — represents a calm, clear, and self-aware leadership style. It is the ability to assert oneself not from a place of ego or power but from a place of clarity and purpose. Leaders like Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela exemplified this. Their leadership wasn’t about following predefined paths but creating new ones that aligned with their personal truths.
Dharampal Ji, a historian of Indian traditions, reflected on how Gandhi’s powerful awakening of the Indian spirit was short-lived. To reinvigorate such leadership, we must go beyond surface-level inspiration and understand the deeper roots of our leadership identity. This involves confronting the passive, outdated parts of ourselves (sullen docility) and transforming them into active, intentional leadership (sāttvic assertion).
So, how do we move from imitation to authenticity? How do we go from stagnation to sāttvic assertion? It starts with self-awareness.
Reflecting on our life stories, Brene Brown says, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we will ever do.” It’s not about chasing someone else’s success but embracing our own journey—warts and all.
Leaders who want to move forward must create spaces for personal growth and collective evolution. They must also encourage reflection, vulnerability, and authenticity. As Harvard Business Review noted in its study on leadership, “Leaders who are self-aware and recognize the value of their own unique contribution are more effective in the long term.”
This is where collective spaces like Koodam and Difficulty of Being Dharmic (DOBD) come into play. These forums allow leaders to come together to explore the external aspects of leadership and the internal journeys that shape them. Koodam, for example, provides a space for deep dialogue, self-inquiry, and collective reflection. It allows leaders to break free from their stagnant roles and discover new ways of being.
Ultimately, leadership is not a destination — it’s a journey. And the greatest challenge on this journey is finding and honouring your unique self. Trust in yourself, not as an imitation of someone else’s greatness, but as a beacon of your own. When you lead from this place, you will inspire others and find the truest, most powerful version of yourself.
Steve Correa is an Executive Coach and Author of The Indian Boss at Work, Thinking Global, Acting Indian
Ronald D’Souza has Corporate and Consulting Experience and mentors new startups.
This article was published on Medium on Oct 24, 2024. https://medium.com/@stevecorrea.com/the-journey-of-leadership-and-finding-your-unique-self-fa039bb45c13
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