Some friends joke that married men are perfect husbands, abbreviated to PH. Now this may come as a surprise to everyone that such a concept exists. Only women can skillfully employ this term, offering praise with delicate criticism that only experienced husbands can discern.
My marriage is more than 30 years old, and I'm still working towards being the perfect husband every day. My chosen epitaph would unquestionably bear the inscription "WIP" instead of "RIP" to honour my unwavering commitment as an exemplary husband. May the journey persist with unwavering brilliance!
I read, rather skimmed through 'Men are from Mars and Women from Venus' very late in life. Our parents did not provide a guideline on how to get there (most parents also did not have birds and bees talk). Our friends are ill-equipped to provide help and advice and colleagues at work could at best touch the issue superficially. I see young men struggle with this concept and I thought of writing a handbook on this and even bought a domain name to do so.
Of course, I realised that men do not have this great power of attention and focus to read about what's important. So here are some quick tips
- It matters when a man takes initiative for things to be done at home.
- Cleanliness is a must and there's really no compromise.
- Clothes and shoes must be well-kept and maintained (yes clothes need to be ironed when required).
- Eat healthy and cook an occasional meal (even noodles work)
- Think of the other person all the time (respect her time, priorities etc.).
- Integrity and commitment are a must. If you commit to doing a thing, please get it done.
- Listening skills are more important than problem-solving. Men tend to rush to solve a problem when simple listening will help more.
- Be kind and even tempered (which means do not raise your voice), socialise (meet family and friends). If you check, the family is always more in touch with the mother or wives' relatives.
- The little things matter every day on how you live your life.
- The bigger things also matter, but they cannot be self-centered. Men tend to focus on career and money but being happy is more important for women. A hug can do more wonders than an expensive gift (don't call me a cheap guy)
I have just put down 10 things because the men cannot read or remember beyond that and women will say we already know this. The reality is that women remember all the important things for the family and men remember what's important to them. Perhaps this Blog is a bit too long already ;-)
Have a great weekend and men cook a meal......
Share this post