(Steve Correa & Ronald D’Souza ) 805 words.
For narrative purposes, this article is written in the first person.
I recently attended a leadership seminar where my ex-colleague took the stage. He spoke with conviction about leadership being a scarce and precious resource, touching on team-building, organisation, and many of the familiar leadership clichés. While his speech was well-structured, I couldn’t shake the lingering sense of anomaly — it was strange for me to hear him speak so authoritatively on the subject. After all, I knew his background well; his past choices and experiences had shaped my perception of him in a particular way. His leadership ideas didn’t align with the person I had known.
Yet, glancing over at my wife, I saw something striking. She was clearly impressed. Her perspective differed entirely from mine — she found him articulate, engaging, and convincing. She remarked that he had a natural ability to communicate his vision, and to her, he embodied leadership.
So why the stark difference in perception? What made us see the same speaker in such contrasting lights? I thought carefully about the dissonance. This is often the case with the contrast between the public and private persona. Whatever he spoke about — team-building, leadership, organisation — most of us (given our corporate background) have done similar things at various points in our lives. Yet, he positioned it in a way that made it feel fresh and insightful. My assessment of him was clearly rooted in who I knew him to be almost 30 years ago. Time has moved on, and so has he, yet a frozen meaning and symbol stayed in my mind.
Truth be told, all this left me a little confused about who was right. But the more important part was that I hadn’t moved on. I still saw him through the prism of 30 years ago. That is, he had moved on and made a successful career, and perhaps I did not like the guy’s personal attributes, which clouded my judgment. Does this happen to most of us?
As Heraclitus once said, “You never step into the same river twice.” Things change with time, and so should our perceptions and judgments. The version of my colleague I knew then is not the one standing before me now, and we often fail to acknowledge this evolution in others — and even in ourselves. The fact is that even as married couples, we wake up each morning to new, wholly different people, but do we recognise this? I realise that if I have to see a change in the other, I have to see a change in myself to respond to the other.
And this is true not just with leaders but with actors as well. We often encounter their larger-than-life personas on the screen — charismatic, confident, and deeply emotional. Yet, when you meet them in person, they might be completely different — more reserved, even awkward, or quietly reflective. I’ve met a few actors myself, and the stark contrast between their public performance and private demeanour was striking. It was as if I was seeing two different people.
This speaks to the larger truth about the nature of public versus private personas. What we project to the world often aligns with certain expectations and roles, but who we are behind the curtain can be a much more nuanced and layered proposition. This divide is common and necessary, as it allows individuals to preserve a sense of self that is not constantly subject to the public eye. It’s almost like there is a private ‘core’ and, outwardly, an ‘adaptive’ self.
There are many forms of leadership, but our perception often narrows to a very specific, limited range. We view leadership through the lens of corporate structures or occasionally political contexts, associating it primarily with titles, positions, and power. Yet leadership transcends these boundaries. It exists in every domain of life — whether in communities, families, movements, or creative endeavours — and is not confined to boardrooms or government offices.
Moreover, there’s a distinct difference between leadership as a concept and effective leadership in action. It’s not just about holding a position or leading a group; it’s about those who take an idea forward, sacrifice their time, and put in the effort to make it a reality. Often unsung, these individuals demonstrate a form of leadership imbibed through action, not authority. They might not wear the title of “leader.” Still, they embody the essence of leadership by inspiring others and creating meaningful change — the Covid Warriors (thousands of personnel who worked tirelessly is an example).
Leadership should be recognised broadly, beyond organisational hierarchies or charismatic displays. It’s about recognising that leadership is all around us, in both public and private lives, in the big and the small, and in those who quietly take the initiative to create lasting impact.
Steve Correa is an Executive Coach and Author of The Indian Boss at Work, Thinking Global, Acting Indian
Ronald D’Souza has Corporate and Consulting Experience and mentors new startups
This article was published on Medium on Oct 24, 2024. https://medium.com/@stevecorrea.com/leadership-perceptions-past-judgments-vs-present-realities-9b1d22ef063e
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