A few years ago I had this habit of saying 'Trust me" and I would reel off some facts/data to support my view. I would usually be up to date with my facts. However, 2 instances rather feedback, forced me to drop these words from my Lexicon. A friend said it's hard to know if I'm telling the truth when I start a conversation with "Trust me," and a classmate said I don't know everything.
I did some introspection on these comments and I realised that quite often I was offering unsolicited opinions and even though the data might have been accurate the recipient was not in the mood to accept or understand. At other times it felt that I was trying to show off what I know. Lastly, I realised that my desire to be proactive and reduce risks or future problems was not understood or appreciated.
This is not an uncommon issue. Parents try to pre-empt risks to their child's career etc. which advice is ignored any way. Teachers/Mentors face the same issue. Ask someone why they are not prepared, and they will tell you that they did not expect the situation to be upon him immediately. Try rationalising with someone who has strong beliefs, and it is like tackling Ronaldo or Messi at the peak of their prowess. You feel that you gave it your best shot, but they will still get past you.
How to live with a feeling that things can go wrong, and you are only trying to prevent them. Frankly, it is like feedback, if the other person does not accept or value it, the feedback is useless. Ignoring signs leads to making mistakes, which can be a learning experience for some people. It depends on how quickly they learn and avoid making the same mistakes again.
I have stopped saying "TRUST ME" and in fact volunteer less and less information even when I know. Quite often I choose to keep my own counsel and go with the flow. Also, my reading and quest for knowledge is more inwardly focused , and I really don't feel the need to position or articulate a point of view.
Is this a sign of the advancing years? TRUST ME not to know the truth!
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